I moved here during an incognito snowstorm. Nobody saw me and I saw nobody. I hadn’t been here long before the neighbourly savage arrived to introduce herself. She was wearing a preposterous kimono.
“I’m on Twitter. I seek to make the world a better place. Fuck this, fuck that – we’d all be better off without that fucking lot.”
Being a tolerant person, I made allowances for the gaudy getup and moronic prattle of this jarring Paddy.
“Up the workers!”
Now that upset me. There was something mannish in this unnerving scatterbrained creature. However, beneath the atrocious outfit, I could see she had affable nipples. As for the muff, I hoped it were homogenised. A shag on my doorstep! Ah, this was the life, but of course, life is a risky business, isn’t it.
Orgasms were in the offing, virtuoso of course, but I’m sure she’d make out somehow. Irreversible orifices : I was all for those. I intended to give this effort a hearty poke.
“I’ve just had an operation”
Who cares! Take off that out-of-place artifact and get fucked.
“I used to be a woman.”
And on Twitter too!