God In The Post

I have just had a minor invitation, to go down a savoury shaft.
This fortunate event comes from having placed a personal ad in a local rag. I had been without for far too long and my rod was overflowing.

“Hi! Come in.”
I entered her salon and was greeted by an odorous overture of musk. My head reeled, my rod rose.
“Coffee?”
“Eh? Oh.. yes please.”
Without saying, next on the agenda was the fanny foray. I felt a touch of guilt for intending to skip foreplay, but my pleasure always came first. I’ve always been a one-night-stand man,

It was short and sweet, no smiles and quick goodbyes. Once home, I poured myself a drink to celebrate, to be topped off with a pipeful of Royal Yacht.
I reached into my coat pocket.
‘What.?’
God! I Where was God? I’d lost God! My God, my God, why hast Thou forsaken me?

Suddenly, the ‘phone rang.
“Hello?”
“You forgot your pipe”
“Ah yes!
I cursed. It was the musk. I had been overcome by the musk!
“I’ll pop-”
“I’ve just posted it”

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