“The Amputee”

“The Amputee”

I once had a dialogue with a log
Trouble was, it was very heavy going
You’d assume, wouldn’t you, it was raining
You’d be wrong, twas the log, kept complaining

It had wanted to chat, of this and that
Sadly, no-one ever came to console
It talked of the problems of its arsehole
“It’s turning”, it said “into a keyhole”

I found its sorry plight quite disturbing
Asked how all this had come to be
“Wouldn’t you agree” it said “if you’d lost your knee
You’d no longer be a ruddy tree!”

Embarrassed, I nodded and said « I see »

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